This isn’t like my usual posts, but I want to share this with you because it’s foundational to who I am in the most elemental way. I'd like you to meet someone very special. You can probably guess we're related. Her name is Francine. She is my birth mother and today would have been her 73rd birthday. She passed away in an accident 25 years ago. It's a weird milestone. On one hand, I am so grateful to know her name and to begin learning who she was. On the other, I'm very sad we will never have the chance to meet in person. I know that if we did, after lots of hugging and crying and more hugging and crying 'cos that's how we roll here, I would thank her for the life she gave me, and the sacrifice she made that brought me into the lives of a family who didn't think they could have kids. That they were so happy, they got pregnant the year after they got me. I would thank her for bringing Pauline and me together and share how we have always felt we were destined to be sisters. I would tell her how happy I am she had another child and how over the moon filled with love and joy Pauline and I are for our brother Ian. I would wish that she could meet my mom Margaret, they'd have a lot to talk about. While I may not be able to say those words to her, I can bow deeply in gratitude to her for giving me life. And to Pauline and Ian, my siblings, my heart, for embracing each other with incredible openness and the same deep love you share with me. And I continue to be in awe of the warmth shown by Francine's family and friends who are sharing their stories and memories so that I might know her better. I haven't met all of you yet but I truly love each of you. <3
Today would have been my mom's 84th birthday. I miss her. She always put the comfort and safety of others above her own. If you ever went to her house, she fed you. Immediately. And if my sister or I dropped a snack, we'd hear, "it's ok, I'll eat the one that fell on the floor." I will always be grateful for her sacrifices, presence, love and care which have shaped who we are today.
“My mother's gifts of courage to me were both large and small. The latter are woven so subtly into the fabric of my psyche that I can hardly distinguish where she stops and I begin.”
― Maya Angelou, Mom & Me & Mom